David Myers's Suggestions for a Happier Life

26 Safar 1434

1. Realize that enduring happiness doesn't come from success. People adapt to changing circumstances - even to wealth or a disability. Thus wealth is like health: its utter absence breeds misery, but having it (or any circumstances we long for) doesn't guarantee happiness.

2. Take control of your time. happy people feel in control of their lives, often aided by mastering their use of time. It helps to set goals and break them into daily aims. Although we often overestimate how much we will accomplish in any given day (leaving us frustrated), we generally underestimate how much we can accomplish in a year, given just a little progress every day.

3. Act happy. We can sometimes act ourselves into a frame of mind. Manipulated into a smiling expression, people feel better; when they scowl, the whole world sees to scowl back. So put on a happy face. Talk as if you feel positive self-esteem, are optimistic, and are outgoing. Going through the motions can trigger the emotions.

4. Seek work and leisure that engages your skills. Happy people often are in zone called "flow" - absorbed in a task that challenges them without overwhelming them. The most expensive forms of leisure (sitting on a yacht) often provide less flow experience than gardening, socializing, or craft work.

5. Join the "movement" movement. An avalanche of research reveals that aerobic exercise not only promotes health and energy, it also is an antidote for mild depression and anxiety. Sound minds reside in sound bodies. Off your duffs, couch potatoes. 

6. Give your body the sleep it wants. Happy people live active vigorous lives yet reserve time for renewing sleep and solitude. Many people suffer from a sleep debt, with resulting fatigue, diminished alertness, and gloomy moods. 

7. Give priority to close relationship. Intimate friendship with those who care deeply about you can help you weather difficult times. Confiding is good for soul and body. Resolve to nurture your closest relationships: to not take those closest to you for granted, to display to them the sort of kindness that you display to others, to affirm them, to play together and share together. To rejuvenate your affections, resolve in such ways to act lovingly. 

8. Focus beyond the self. Reach out to those in need. Happiness increases helpfulness (those whole feel good do good). But doing good also makes one feel good.

9. Keep a gratitude journal. Those who pause each day to reflect on some positive aspect of their lives (their health, friends, family, freedom, education, senses, natural surroundings, and so on) experience heightened well-being.

10. Nurture your spiritual self. For many people, faith provides a support community, a reason to focus beyond self, and a sense of purpose and hope. Study after study finds that actively religious people are happier and that they cope better with crises. 

Adapted from Myers, D, The Pursuit of Happiness (1993) as cited in Snyder, C. R., Lopez, S. J. & Pedrotti, J. T. (2011). Positive psychology: The scientific and practical explorations of human strengths (2nd ed.). Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage.(pp. 138).

Key Term

Flow: The pleasurable experience resulting from engagement in an interesting activity that properly matches or challenges a person's skills and abilities.